Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Snaggle-toothed freak...

Right, so frequently I complain about these externs we get in the office.  No, I'm not stupid - they are externs, not interns.  Interns are paid and usually have a brain.  These particular externs (minus two) are brainless twits with the aspirations of a dead gnat.  First off, I am annoyed that they are even in the office.  It was never discussed amongst the staff - do we need one?  Do we have enough work for one?  The answers, by the way, are no and no.  Yes, we are ungodly stupid behind, but it's not stuff that we can teach them.  Why?  Please refer to the previous adjectives (brainless twits).  

Anyhoo, this current one is particularly annoying.  The really bad part is she follows the only two externs we have ever liked.  So we had two that broke the mold - were human, had brains, knew how to use them, and aspirations to better themselves.  I digress, current brainless twit takes annoying to a whole new level. She comes in and begins talking before she opens the door to the office.  She continues her pointless babble the ENTIRE time she is here.  We have had to hear about her marriage/pregnancy/divorce/child/volunteer work/current job at a men's strip club/previous jobs/school, etc.  Did I mention she has only been here for a week and a half?

Today, we decided to order pizza....we had this discussion - loudly - while the twit was here.  She could have piped in any time, but chose not to which is fine. You don't want pizza?  Sweet, more for me.  Right. We order the pizza, it arrives, my partner in crime pays me for her portion we eat.  Snaggle-tooth decides she's hungry.  Now, she also overheard us discussing the fact that we would take home our pizzas (we ordered 2 mediums) and feed the leftovers to our respective families.  How do I know she heard?  She commented on it.  Anyhoo, she decides she's hungry, trudges into my office, grabs a plate and snags 3 slices of my pizza.

EXCUSE ME?  Did you ask?  Did you offer to pay?  Are you an asshole?  Did you even wash your hands?  #$!$#!@$!#%!  W.T.F.EVER.

I informed my partner in crime that if said twit did not fork over some cash I would have to treat her like the dog she appears to be.  Oddly enough, just moments ago (while I'm in the middle of typing this) the twit walks in with $3 and says "here's for what I ate."

*sigh*.  Yep, it's a buck a slice.  Sorry, Phil, no leftovers for you....snaggle-tooth done ate most of it.  Jackass.


  1. Where do they find them? And they walk among us and reproduce.

  2. They camp out at Ross Medical.

  3. I'm picturing an obese snaggle-tooth. Am I right?

  4. actually, no. it is a small snaggle-tooth freak. but it has some other highly unattractive features along with the fact that it has no functioning brain.

  5. Ross Medical.....does anyone come out of there knowing anything?