Friday, May 11, 2012

Shhhh....I'm hiding....

No seriously - I am....I'm curled up in the fetal position in the corner of the bathroom with the door locked and the water running in hopes that no one will ever find me.  Why?  Because - the fucktards are everywhere....I'M NOT KIDDING.  Everywhere I turn there's another one and I have to tell you - these fucktards are FAR more frightening than zombies.  These creatures are so stupid they make zombies look like rocket scientists.

First we have the lady on the phone - "You're charging my mother for a no show fee. I called the Better Business Bureau and you cannot legally charge for services you did not provide."

*sigh*  Well, she's partially right - no one can legally charge you for services that were not provided.  However, we're NOT charging your mother for an office visit.  We're charging your mother for not showing up to TWO office visits.  The fee is $25 (for each missed visit) as opposed to the fee for an actual visit which is a bare minimum of $75.  If you would like, I can certainly talk to the doctor about raising our no show fee?  I was, of course, sugary sweet while stating these facts.  She then fires back at me, "Look, you don't know me and I don't know you and I don't want to start a pissing match that I will win."

I'm sorry, what?  Right, ok, I got it.  You are a fucktard and I cannot lower myself to speak with you anymore.  Buh-bye now.  I think while I'm sitting here on the floor I will google and see if it is legal to charge people extra for being fucktards.  There has to be some kind of loop hole that allows for charging for ignorance...

Then there's the "new" guy.  First off - thanks fucktards for informing me.  Second - how about this phone call..."Hello. I am here." 

All right, that's nice.  Who the fuck are you and where the fuck is here?  Seriously?  Psychic is not on my reseme.  Let's try this again.  I ask oh-smart-one who he is and what he wants and he then shares that he is the new guy and he's meeting with some big wigs.  Basically, it was a big cluster fuck...partially because those of us who answer the phone were not informed and partially because....well, because.

I'm OH SO excited to see who the next fucktard will be.  There have been others today, however, I am not at liberty to call them out.  I think I need to start blogging under another name.

Oh well.  If you need me, I'll be pretending to have spattergoit....(that's a Harry Potter reference, btw).

Thursday, May 3, 2012

T-1....Let the celebrations begin

Yep, today started the fun.  I got to leave work early and go out with the girls (from work) and have drinks and lunch on the boss.  FABULOUS!  I had a great time although I greatly missed my bff Carri.  However, since she did just have a baby, I shall forgive her.

I would love to continue celebrating this evening, however, I must bust through a crap ton of yucky homework to ensure that I do not have to do homework Friday or Saturday. 

Wish me luck - it's going to be a long night.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

T-2....It could happen....

I was unable to sleep last night as I could not shut my brain off.  I tossed and turned pondering all the things that need to get done prior to graduation.  I pondered the stuff that needed to be done at work and home and how I could manage to accomplish them all.  When I finally (half-assed) shut my brain off, I had a GREAT (and by GREAT, I mean "great") dream.  It went a little like this....

I was all dressed for graduation.  I was in my "pretty" (read:  ugly) cap and gown and my cute little outfit underneath.  I was wearing my favorite pair of wedges (the same ones I intend - intended? - to wear Friday).  Here's where it's a little shady.  I know big college graduations they just introduce the degree - for example, "BSB/ACC" and everyone (with that degree) stands up and then sits down.  Amen, you have graduated. 

However, in my dream it was like high school.  So, there I go wandering up the ungodly high steps and across the 4 1/2 mile straight away to shake some creepy dude's hand and get my pretend degree.  All is fine and good until, well, I tripped.

Not only did I trip, I fell flat on my face.  Ugh. *sigh*  I fear this will happen.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012


Wow.  So, I've been kind of blah about this whole thing.  Like, it hasn't really set in, maybe?  Well, at least until today.  Today it seemed everything happened at once. I had a very good friend call me and talk with me about my plan for Friday.  Pretty sure it's common knowledge that I have a relatively large group of friends that we spend a lot of time with.  I haven't (or at least haven't tried to) made a big deal about this for the most part.  

Anyway, she called me today and told me that she along with all of the rest of "the crew" would be in attendance if that was what I wanted.  I don't think she realizes how special she made me feel.  I don't expect everyone to be there - it's a bit of an inconvenience and I'm unsure how much room there is and I don't want everyone to make a big deal. Yes, this is a HUGE accomplishment for me.  BUT, the fact that she even acknowledged it was enough.  

Then, another friend determined that we should have a celebratory lunch on Thursday.  I talked to my mom who told me my grandparents would be in attendance (which means the world to me) and that they would like to go to dinner with us prior to graduation.

So, while I'm all emotional about all of that ^^ I'm now also starting to panic about when we should leave here to go there and when we're going to have dinner/check into the hotel.  And how I'm going to make it to the church (which is where I'm graduating) on time.  

Yeah, it's setting in now.  I'm fricking graduating from college on Friday.  I'm sorta freaking out a little.