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Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Dear Inappropriate Asshat,

First, I would like to thank your mother for not suffocating you as a child.  No really, I'm glad you're still breathing the same air as me.  That's great.  Second, I would like to thank your father for donating the obviously demented sperm to create you.

I do not know where (or more likely - IF) you went to school or where you grew up.  Ha, I mean, where you lived from birth to now as you have obviously not grown up; HOWEVER, it is quite obvious that you are an uneducated juvenile worthless piece of shit.

What was my first clue?  Well, that would be the fact that you're probably between 35-45, walking through the hospital with your "sagging" shorts with (of course) your whitey tighties showing.  (This proves that you actually are a douchecanoe)  Along with the unkept hair and filthy wife-beater shirt on. 

The second clue was when you looked at me and said, "Hey, baby, nice rack." 


Excuse me?  Let's get one thing clear, while you are in fact correct and I do actually have a "nice rack" what you said is offensive.  I am not, have never been, nor will I ever be your baby.  Fuck off.  Second, don't address me by the size of my chest.  LOOK AT MY FUCKING EYES IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME FUCKTARD.

Although, I realize you can't do that.   I know that if you look into my eyes you will realize that you really are a disgrace to the human race and a boil on the ass of society.  So, instead, you choose to prove this point by gawking at my boobs. 

You're damn lucky I have class.  You're also damn lucky there were a bunch of people around since I considered showing you another great asset...my ability to kick you in the nuts AND laugh about it. Please, for the sake of humanity, never speak again. 

Sincerely,
The Bitch

2 comments:

  1. Hmmm....I see you've picked up some terms from PIWTPITT. :)

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    ReplyDelete