Did I not forewarn you that there would most definitely be more? Ok, I shall now add on to my previous list. What number were we on???
4. The sloppy sloth "volunteer" in our office. By volunteer, I mean the person who is required to volunteer at some business until she gets a job because she has spent SO many years getting state aid while not working. Awesome. So, I've spent the last 10 years supporting your lazy ass while you cranked out 3 kids and stayed at home with no means of support of your own. Yes, I sure do love people like you. You are required to volunteer in our office 15 hours per week - to a normal person, that means 15 hours, to your lazy sloth ass it means whenever you feel the need to roll in here (in your jammies unshowered, of course). Your schedule is M/W/F from 8-1. Monday you not only did not show up, you didn't call (from your iPhone - seriously, you have a fucking iPhone and no fucking job??). Wednesday you showed up at 11. That's close to 8 (are we sensing the sarcasm?). You told the office manager you would be here from 8-4 today. OMFG YOU'RE GOING TO BE HERE ALL FUCKING DAY. Somebody hand me a letter opener so I can stab myself in the temple. Right, what was I thinking. You, of course, called with an excuse at 9 about why you wouldn't be here until 10 and then you just now showed up (it's 10:30 fucktard). L.O.S.E.R. I have no idea why you can't find a job...
5. FUCKING VOICEMAIL TREES FROM HELL. So, I have to call an out of state Blue Cross policy today. Of course, the automated asshole comes on and informs me that everything is electronic so I should not need to speak to a live person. Here's the problem, they sent us a check with no notation as to what account it is for. No patient name or ID, no date of service, NOTHING. Right. So, the automated douche bag informs me I must either put in the patient's ID number or SSN. -__- Really? Of course, it's also voice activated. So, I said "customer service." It then tells me I do not need customer service - again. To which I replied, "are you seriously fucking kidding me?" It did not know how to respond to that. Huh. Weird.
4. The sloppy sloth "volunteer" in our office. By volunteer, I mean the person who is required to volunteer at some business until she gets a job because she has spent SO many years getting state aid while not working. Awesome. So, I've spent the last 10 years supporting your lazy ass while you cranked out 3 kids and stayed at home with no means of support of your own. Yes, I sure do love people like you. You are required to volunteer in our office 15 hours per week - to a normal person, that means 15 hours, to your lazy sloth ass it means whenever you feel the need to roll in here (in your jammies unshowered, of course). Your schedule is M/W/F from 8-1. Monday you not only did not show up, you didn't call (from your iPhone - seriously, you have a fucking iPhone and no fucking job??). Wednesday you showed up at 11. That's close to 8 (are we sensing the sarcasm?). You told the office manager you would be here from 8-4 today. OMFG YOU'RE GOING TO BE HERE ALL FUCKING DAY. Somebody hand me a letter opener so I can stab myself in the temple. Right, what was I thinking. You, of course, called with an excuse at 9 about why you wouldn't be here until 10 and then you just now showed up (it's 10:30 fucktard). L.O.S.E.R. I have no idea why you can't find a job...
5. FUCKING VOICEMAIL TREES FROM HELL. So, I have to call an out of state Blue Cross policy today. Of course, the automated asshole comes on and informs me that everything is electronic so I should not need to speak to a live person. Here's the problem, they sent us a check with no notation as to what account it is for. No patient name or ID, no date of service, NOTHING. Right. So, the automated douche bag informs me I must either put in the patient's ID number or SSN. -__- Really? Of course, it's also voice activated. So, I said "customer service." It then tells me I do not need customer service - again. To which I replied, "are you seriously fucking kidding me?" It did not know how to respond to that. Huh. Weird.
I thank you for my early am entertainment. I know I'm not supposed to be laughing but someday you're going to use these blogs and the comments to write a book. :)
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